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The Inseparable Couple

Wednesday, 29 September 2010 10 comments

Silhouette of two people on bike


You know the ones, they can't be apart for more than two minutes before whining about how much they miss each other. Someone pass me a bucket, quick. Wherever they go - they go together, whatever they do - they do it together and heaven forbid they ever get separated. These people will get your up chuck reflex fitter than a Butcher's bicep. They can be impossible to be around.

No matter the occasion: birthdays, nights out, new years eve; they're never seen apart. You can find them lodged in some dimly lit corner feasting off of each others perfection, so high on cloud nine they probably don't have much time for anyone else.

They're the kind of couple that makes you question your own relationship, guaranteed to get you thinking "Why aren't we like that?" Well I'll tell you why, because you're not The Walton's and life isn't one big Little House on the Prairie, no Sirree Bob! And that's a good thing. It's healthy to have arguments, to want some space sometimes and to go out with friends every once in a while. Nobody's perfect.

It's all fine and dandy to spend time together, it's all part of being in love, but not so in love that your basically velcro'ed to your boyfriend all day long. So come on guys, tear yourselves apart for 5 minutes, and save some love for the others.

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TOAR Blogger Award's 2010

Sunday, 26 September 2010 1 comments


Yep i know, another award, i bet you're getting bored of me now, but I'm chuffed, and I'm going to celebrate anyway so get your party hats ready. 

You all must know TOAR's blog, if not then get yourself clicking right here sharpish. The reason i have been honoured with this award is because I'm such a fan of her Twilight Tuesdays. They keep me updated with juicy gossip and twilight tidbits. Thanks TOAR on behalf of me myself and i for quenching my thirst for all things Edward. It's super appreciated.


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Ask Alice Anything

Have you got a relationship dilemma? 


Whether your boyfriend has cheated, your best friend stole your man, or you simply want an answer to a dating question, no matter how ridiculous or trivial, Alice will do her best to give you her pearls of wisdom and sometimes unorthodox advice. Alternatively if you have any funny, romantic or just damn right rude dating stories you want to share don't be afraid to send those too.

All questions will be posted anonymously unless otherwise requested by you.
All you have to do is send your question or story to this email address theboyfrienddrama@hotmail.com and wait for your question and answer to appear in this section.

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A Weekend With The Royal Air Force

Friday, 24 September 2010 3 comments



Last weekend was spent trying to get out of the boyfriends yearly ritual of attending the Air Show. Now i don't actually hate it, but the thing is, once you've seen one plane you've seen em all. Jet engine noise + testosterone + rain = me being a miserable grump bag. There is nothing worse than standing in the freezing British weather with your ear drums being abused by the entire Royal Air Force. However this year i decided; if i have to go, then I'm going to enjoy it, even if it means 5 hours of coastal breeze and hair like Amy Winehouse in a hurricane.

Due to me being late, as per usual we got there at around 13:30, just in time for the Red Arrows (i took the photo above, whilst sheltering under the pier from the downpour). They were amazing as always, and not one of them crashed so that was a plus.

After the Red Arrows the rain died down enough for us to go explore. We came across this...


The PARATOWER! So colossal they put it in capitals. The idea being that you sign up, climb to the top where you then jump off aided by some parachute regiment troops. Yeah right like any one in there right mind would do that...


Yep that's me right there. What could i do, they dared me? I was literally shaking at the thought of free falling off this giant scaffolding. I was petrified, it was higher than i thought, and the metal framework that was holding me up was wavering slightly in the wind. When it came to my turn the Para guy turns around and says, "i guess your scared of heights then?," no you plonker, I'm not, what I'm scared of is the hard floor I'll be hurtling towards once you tempt me to take this leap of faith. Anyway after several false starts i...


...jumped and thankfully made it safely back on terra firma to continue my life, despite breaking my new necklace. I told you i was determined to enjoy myself, jumping off things at great heights is not my usual choice of activity.

Next stop the crappy souvenir stands that sell you everything from a Top Gun jacket to novelty mugs. Basically anything big enough to stick a photograph of an aeroplane on, was up for grabs. Amongst all of the overpriced tat and fake military uniforms, i spotted this little gem....


Apparently you don't have to be a genius to fly planes these days. Armed with a red pen and some tippex any old idiot can do it! I'm thinking of signing up, just kidding. As if I'd wear those military issue uniforms, they only ever look good on men.

So after jumping off buildings and photographing coasters i spotted a huge crowd gathering around a big red marquee. I wandered over to find that the Red Arrow team were taking a well earned break from flying planes to sign autographs. Yes autographs, these people were being mobbed! I managed to snap a few quick pics and actually met one of them, before almost being crushed by plane spotters on my way out...



To my surprise there were two women on the team. Yay for girl power! Plus the guys were pretty hot. Take this guy for instance...


He's a a Blue Arrow, and really really tall. This guy towered over everyone, although his red overall'ed team mates seemed to grab most of the attention. I salute you blue overall guy for rocking that all-in-one with style!

After all the excitement i was pretty exhausted, the weather turned from bad to horrific and i was getting bored. The boyfriend insisted that we stay to the very end and so i was stuck in the pouring rain looking like a drowned rat. Then, out of nowhere a freaking bomb went off. Yes you heard me a bomb...



Okay, okay, so it was a controlled explosion, but still, i nearly had a heart attack. That was it, i was done, I'd had enough of the rain, the wind and the big men with big weapons, i was off home to a warm bath and a pamper session to make me feel female again.

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Kristen Stewart: Happy Face

Tuesday, 21 September 2010 2 comments

Now i love Twilight as much (if not more) than the next person, but do you know what really bugs me? This ...

LONDON, ENGLAND - FEBRUARY 21: (UK TABLOID NEWSPAPERS OUT) Kristen Stewart poses with her Orange rising star award in front of the winners boards at the Orange British Academy Film Awards held at The Royal Opera House on February 21, 2010 in London, England. (Photo by Dave Hogan/Getty Images)


Why so sad Kristen? I mean what the Grinch is up with this girl? Somebody tell her a joke quick before her face sticks that way.

She has bags of cash, a boyfriend to die for, and did i mention she gets to snog the the shirt off Taylor Lautner and still go home with Pattinson on her arm. What's the problem K-Stew, you're living the dream?

I read somewhere recently that she doesn't know what to do with all her dosh and is looking for investment opportunities. Well how about you pay a plastic surgeon to weld a smile on that moon face huh? Life can't be that bad. I guess it's all just too much for her. Jeez if you're really that unhappy I'll trade places with you - yes i am really that selfless, I'm such a nice girl.

I have one piece of advice for you Stewart, "Have a break, have a Kit Kat."





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2nd Blog Award: I must Be Doing Something Right

Monday, 20 September 2010 1 comments

And you wanna see my feet?(Men),(Women)and Dating: My First Blog Award


Tinzley gave me my second blog with substance award! Go me! Since i have already posted my 10 blogs and answers i would just like to thank Tinzley!
So here goes...

Thank you candy heart

Her blog is chock full of great advice for anyone single or in a relationship so pay a visit and show her some love.

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Vagina Tease

Friday, 17 September 2010 6 comments

Young couple embracing in night club


This installment of the boyfriend drama comes from a good friend of mine. Yes congratulations you get a break from my own relationship ramblings and get to enjoy someone else's. So gather round folks...

They say us women tease, but sometimes men can be worse. They get their hooks into you, and then before you know it you're being tossed back in the pond like an old trout.

My friend, lets call her Emma for the sake of broadcasting this to the world. Just so you know Emma is one of the nicest people i have ever met. I'd be happy to verbally abuse any loser who so much as sneezed in her general direction, so when she told me this my first reaction was; let me shame him. Let me put him on my blog as an example to teases everywhere, but unfortunately I'm not that vindictive so i won't mention his name. Maybe i was being a bit harsh, I'm biased after all, but i'll let you decide.

Emma went clubbing last weekend and bumped into duh duh duh... the dreaded ex, or as she put it her "ex, ex, ex." This guy was no normal ex though, firstly, he stood her up, granted it was probably 5 years ago, but hey that doesn't mean he gets away with it; and secondly, he dumped her by text. What a cock feature!

Anyways, Em was just out having fun, stretching her weekend legs when things got heated. The ex finally decides to grow some balls and approaches her. He apologises and starts to get his smooth groove on, telling her that he regrets treating her badly. 5 drinks later they kiss. He then leaves without any warning, doing the same thing he did all those years ago.

This leaves me thinking, who came off better? Yeah the guy obviously has issues but Emma got a snog out of it. Congratulations Em you just had a one kiss stand! On the other hand though if i met him, I'd personally see to it that his private region is in a plaster cast for the rest of the year. Just kidding, but don't tempt me.

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Nappy Pants

Tuesday, 14 September 2010 8 comments


Image Source - Eric Adams campaign for better censorship.



There's no imagination required when dating one of these guys, no need to guess what mysterious treasure is hiding in his pants. It's all laid out there, a smorgasbord of bum cheeks and rump steak. What is with this hideous trend? Guys walking around with their boxers hanging out like they can't be bothered to pull their trousers up like normal people. This isn't Playgirl you know, this is planet Earth, put your lamb steaks away, you saggy pant wearing loon. You're just asking for a wedgie.

Come on is it really that hard to dress yourself? Believe it or not but your Spiderman Y-Fronts are not that sexy, and since when did walking like a constipated penguin look good? Here's a hint guys, if McFly do it, you shouldn't. In the morning ask yourself, "Would McFly wear their pant this low?" If yes then hike those bad boys up like it's a Simon Cowell theme party.


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Love is Blind

Saturday, 11 September 2010 7 comments

She looks like a Supermodel whilst he looks more like a swamp creature. Come on admit it we have all spotted these couples and thought "What does she see in him? He must have a massive err... car."

It's almost a fact that looks are more important to guys. A guy will happily forgo any meaningful conversation or personality, in order to impress his mates with a trophy girlfriend. It's just in their genes to go for attractive women. Us girls on the other hand want security, love and bit of banter to pass the time.


It seems that a fear of rejection holds us back when it comes to dating. If it's a choice between the obscenely hot Calvin Klein model and the less than average looking guy who works at the record store, which one would you ask out? My guess is that, despite all your lusting after the hot underwear hunk, you would end up asking Mr Average. At least with him, there's less chance of rejection, you protect your feelings and pride by playing it safe. Plus Mr Hot Pants may look gorgeous, but he could have the personality of a rock. Mr Average on the other hand may not be pretty to look at but he could be the most hilarious guy on Earth. Besides who wants to date someone who is better looking than them? At least with Mr Average you will always look stunning. Personally i don't care if he looks like a Picasso painting, if he makes me laugh, well then that's alright by me.

It seems it's not just us mere mortals that are enjoying The Beauty and the Beast trend, the celebs are doing it too. Check out these oddly matched couples...


Evan Rachel Wood & Marilyn Manson:
He looks more like a corpse than Husband material, but each to their own.

NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 13:  (Exclusive Access) Actress Evan Rachel Wood and musician Marilyn Manson arrive for the after party for a special screening of 'Across The Universe' at Bette on September 13, 2007 in New York City.  (Photo by Scott <span class=


Donald Trump & Melania Trump:
His bad hair styling wasn't enough to put her off, but then again he's a multi-millionaire, so i guess that softens the blow of having to wake up to this wig wearing wonder.

Donald Trump and his wife Melania arrive for the premiere of the film Sex And The City 2 in New York May 24, 2010. REUTERS/Lucas Jackson (UNITED STATES - Tags: ENTERTAINMENT)


Jennifer Lopez & Marc Anthony:
He looks like he's constantly hungover with those dark rings around his sunken eyes, this proves that looks don't matter to J-Lo. After all she's still Jenny from the block.

Signer Jenifer Lopez (R) talks to her husband Marc Anthony as they speak to the media prior to a meeting with the Congressional Hispanic Caucus on Capitol Hill in Washington on September 16, 2009. UPI/Kevin <span class=





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PDA: Public Display of Affection

Wednesday, 8 September 2010 9 comments

Woman's Lips Kissing Glass

I can almost feel the nausea rising up already. Yesterday on the train home it was standing room only. I was wedged between some guy who thought my head was a great place to rest his paper and a young couple who couldn't keep their hands off each other.

At first it was kind of cute, but after 10 minutes of listening to their slurpy kissing noises and getting frequently knocked in the side by the over zealous boyfriend trying to grope his girl, i was getting extremely annoyed. I felt like screaming, they were practically fornicating in front of me. Packed in like battery chickens and breathing recycled oxygen, my hair started to go static, rubbing underneath the sports section of some giant's newspaper. It was too crammed to angle myself in another direction, so i was stuck, forced to watch these two animals suck face.

All this got me thinking about PDA, and what is really socially acceptable. It's all fine and dandy when you're the one causing the public love fest but have you ever stopped to think about how uncomfortable you make other people feel? Does it matter what they think? Well i know i'll be turning the volume down on my PDA in future, no one deserves to be subjected to that after a long day at work. Save it for the bedroom people!

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Dear Channing Tatum

Saturday, 4 September 2010 6 comments

Channing-Tatum-Unwrapped-Fighting-Press-Junket-04-2009
Dear John came out on DVD this week and so it was my Friday night movie of choice. I'd never seen it until last night and to be honest, i was expecting the same old rom-com dullness as every other teen love story, but oh no, this one is actually brilliant. I loved it. It's got a surprising plot, really good acting, and of course who could forget, Channing Tatum. He looked so mighty fine in his special forces uniform that i wish i could have jumped through the screen and groped his huge manly shoulders.

This 6ft 1" - muscle ridden hunk deserves a place in my Hollywood Hunks hall of fame. Shame on me for not honouring you sooner Tatum. With a body that delicious i can almost forgive the fact that your name is Channing Tatum. I mean come on who would call themselves that? It sounds like it was stolen from a retired old wrestler. Anyways congrats Channing you can grace my screen with your animal magnetism any day.




Image by Wcfirm (Own work) [CC-BY-3.0], via Wikimedia Commons

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Take The Hint

Wednesday, 1 September 2010 11 comments



Why is that some guys don't seem to get the hint?

Most people at some point in their lives have experienced an unwanted admirer. Someone who, despite your feelings not being mutual, just won't give up. Sure it's flattering at first, but at what point does the flattery become plain old irritating?

This happened to me once. One of my guy friends, who despite knowing that i was in a HAPPY relationship, wouldn't stop texting me. I could say anything to this boy, but nope he still carried on like a crazy stalker beast, annoyingly badgering me like a one man indestructible, love pusher. He repeatedly asked me to go to the cinema with him on Orange Wednesday, (in other words two for the price of one entry). What?! He actually thought that was going to impress me? Unfortunately for him, I'm not a buy one get one free kind of gal. Cheapskate. In the end i resorted to ignoring him all together; politeness just didn't seem to register in his confused brain.

Ignoring him seemed to work for me, but this got me thinking about ways to get out of this situation. So here's 8 creative ways to put him off, if your brave enough...

  • Tell him penises scare you.

  • Tell him you like to wear Bridget Jones style underwear, even on Valentines day.
  • Tell him you are moving to Siberia to live like an Eskimo for 10 years - no phones allowed.
  • Pretend you don't believe in sex before marriage.
  • Tell him your a bigamist, you already have 12 boyfriends and just don't have the time.
  • Tell him you're psychic and can already see that things wont work out between you.
  • Tell him you're a lesbian. This one usually works!
  • Tell him you will only go on a date with him if he promises to wear a dog leash, walk on all fours, and call you Madame Midnight.

... Now watch the horny, lust drain from his mortified face.


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