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Diet Coke: I Just Wanna Make Love to You

Thursday, 29 September 2011 Leave a Comment

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I don't care about the aspartame, or the scientists who say "don't consume anything that tastes nice or you will die a slow and painful death". I will never stop drinking the fizzy stuff. I just love Diet Coke, but what i don't love, is their new ad campaign.

Before i show you their new advert, i want you to be able to see it in the context that i first saw it. So first, view the old adverts below. Trust me when i say they're delicious, (and I'm not just talking about the Coke!) Try your best to ignore the appalling fashion, bad perms and horrendous face furniture and concentrate on the Diet Coke drinking, hunk of hot man flesh.

If nothing else, these adverts convey a clever twist on the whole lecherous builder stereotype. Instead of the builder wolf whistling at anything in a dress, it's the women who are doing the leching. Superb!

Diet Coke's new advert on the other hand, contains puppets. Creepy puppets! Maybe I'm just weird, but anything remotely ventriloquist like scares the living bejeebers out of me. But what really annoys me about these adverts is that they're not just any creepy puppets, but vapid, female, creepy puppets. Unlike the Diet Coke adverts of yesteryear, this ad campaign does nothing for the female image, unless of course women are empowered by shaking their bootay's for a can of fizzy brown liquid. Not cool Diet Coke. Not cool!

It might have been a great campaign if it wasn't superseding the ability to perv at sexy shirtless men. Call me a lech, but bring back the meat!

Join me in my quest to bring back the 11:30 Diet Perv Coke break. The comments section is my mock petition so sign away ladies and don't forget to vote for me to win the Cosmo Blog Awards, Sex & Relationship category. I need your help people!

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  • According to Jewels said:  

    Alright...I love those old commercials. I remember when they first aired and I lusted after those guys! mmmm. I couldn't agree more about the puppets...not okay.

    Unfortunately I do not love diet coke. I can't drink diet sodas since artificial sugars are one of my migraine triggers. Took me a long time drinking diet dr. pepper before I went to the doctor and realized that.

  • Thank, Q said:  

    Ok, the puppets are too Chucky-ish. Puppets kind of creep me out, but muppets are cool. LOL! I'm a Coke Zero fan myself. I don't care for the commercials, just past me a cold one.

  • kitkat said:  

    Old commercials For The Win!!!

  • Alice X said:  

    @Jewels Is it wrong that i still lust after them?

    @Thank Q That's exactly it, they remind me way too much of Chucky! Thanks for clearing that up for me.

    @Kitkat Yay!

  • bwcmf said:  

    Hahaha I had this same train of thought happen when I saw the new freakish commercial!!
    I don't like Diet Coke but at least give me some man meat to look at.

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